Saturday, October 30, 2010

Prosperity is not scarce in a your abundantly supplied world


Consider this. Your feelings follow your thoughts. It doesn't matter if the thoughts are true or untrue. We all have true and untrue thoughts. When you dwell on negative, untrue thoughts about your life or situation, you will feel negative. Even if your circumstances are neutral or even positive. In fact, most are probably neutral and many positive. Your feelings just follow your thoughts though. The problem lies in all the negative untrue judgments we sometimes make about our lives or even about other people. We can change this though if we catch ourselves doing this and correct it repeatedly. We will develop new mental habits of thinking positive.

Develop the habit of always trying to see and expect the positive out of every situation and in others. You will be amazed! Seriously, if you aren't doing this already, do it for one day or one week and see if you don't experience amazing life change. You will begin to see that some things you may have held as impossible for you may actually be possible. You will be amazed because we are pretty much our own self fulfilling prophecy. We receive back from others, what we give out. The world is not against us. It's not a hard life. Prosperity is not scarce in your abundantly supplied world. It's possible to prosper in any economy. In almost any circumstance. It's not as much about what is happening to us as it is how we choose to see it and then react to it. Life is just awaiting our recognition of this. When you do recognize this, you will get busy pursuing the things that you really want in life because you will know that they are yours for the having. You will understand that no matter what life sends your way, you will have the strength, determination and resources needed to deal with it. You will find happiness, not by searching far, deep and wide for it, but just by realizing it was there all the time in abundance but you just hadn't perceived it.


Blessings- Rob


You can also visit me @ truecolors.lifeyo.com

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Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Don't give up yet!


















I saw a friend this week who loves to go cycling. He told me a story of one of his rides recently and I wanted to share it with you. He was telling me that he likes to challenge himself occasionally so he doesn't get stuck in a rut in his riding. He decided to head up a certain mountain road that he's never taken before toward the summit. The road winds back and forth for miles. He rode and rode for a very long time and it was very challenging. It started to get cold as he ascended higher and higher up the hill. Finally he decided to stop and turn back. Downhill of course was a piece of cake. What he didn't realize though was how close he was to the top. If he would have kept going a little bit farther, he would have reached the summit. He then told me that if he would have known, he would have continued up, but because he hadn't done this before, he gave up prematurely. He was so close, yet because of the unknown, he was so far away. He then told me the importance of getting advice and wisdom from people that have gone before you in life. Having a mentor or several can actually put you miles ahead in life. Learning from others who have already been down the path you are on and have had success can put you miles ahead. They have had success in overcoming obstacles and know what to expect. Why do you need to fall into the same mud puddles that they did? You can learn from them and steer clear of them right? I want to encourage you to not give up so quick. Not yet!
Just because you may have fallen down, doesn't mean you are going to stay down. You are probably closer than you think to achieving your goals, whatever they may be, if you don't quit. Everyone has had times when they have questioned themselves on whether or not they should give up something. Some dream, goal, etc. "Maybe it's unrealistic" they say to themselves. Well, maybe it's not! Don't lose this battle in your mind. "Don't give up in the dark, what you received in the light." Maybe you are closer than you think to winning and if you hang in there you might just win. Sometimes it's not about crossing the finish line far ahead of everyone else. Sometimes the difference in winning comes down to an inch. Little efforts all add up and really do matter. When you are discouraged, pick up a motivational book or seek some wisdom from a mentor in regards to your situation. This could mean the difference between victory and defeat. You may discover one small piece of wisdom that shifts the whole scales in your favor. A single grain of rice can tip the scale. A single new concept can win your battle. So don't give up yet!! Not yet!!! You are almost there.

'book


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Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Failure is your friend



It's not that successful people have failed less, it's actually the opposite. They have failed more because they have tried more. Yet they have learned to bounce back quickly. To learn from their failures and therefore use them to their advantage.


"You miss 100% of the shots you never take." -- Wayne Gretzky, Hockey Great


Fear of failure holds so many people back. They are paralyzed. Tell me how one can grow if they stay in the same place? When you try more new things you discover more new things. You learn more and become more. When you try something new, you go down roads you otherwise wouldn't have and see turnoffs and opportunities that you wouldn't have seen if you stayed where you are. So it's better to error on the action side. I've heard it said that "towards the end of your life, you don't regret the things you did as much as the things you didn't try." The things you didn't do out of fear. The chances not taken. Who could even imagine the possibilities if you would have taken those chances. Stepped out of the boat in faith. Who knows, maybe you would have been able to walk on water. Miracles happen when you move out in faith. Maybe you could have started that business in spite of fear. Asked that girl or boy out, in spite of fear. Whatever it is, the greatest rewards usually lie behind the walls of uncertainty. It's faith that will break through those walls. Many times you will be surprised at how many times you will get a yes, if you only ask. Don't let fear defeat you before you even ask. So move forward from this day forward with a new optimistic attitude. An attitude of faith and expectancy. Choose to look for opportunities and decide to take chances and go for the things that you really want inside. You can have fear, and still decide to move forward anyway. When you do, you will discover how fear begins to take a back seat and faith takes the wheel.


Blessings -Rob


You can also visit me @ truecolors.lifeyo.com

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Monday, October 18, 2010

What makes a successful relationship?


What makes a successful relationship? What sets you up for success in relationships and even marriage? Here are my thoughts on this. When you are truly content to be alone. Truly happy with your life. You know yourself, what you are and what you aren't. You have boundries and live by your values and principles. You know what you want and need, and where you are going in life. You have studied about relationships and how to have successful ones. You have learned that your success in any relationship has more to do with you than the other party by taking full responsibility in this area. You have chosen to make good decisions based on rational thought and not just feelings.

You then could possibly qualify for a successful relationship with another individual.

Yes, relationships can work without all this, but consider this. The divorce rate is over half. What's going to think you won't be another statistic? With all the eyes on divorce as the enemy, I see it differently. Divorce is not the enemy to a successful relationship. The enemy is the "lack of wisdom" in the first place. When you talk to someone who has gone through or is going through a divorce, you will usually always hear them discuss how the the other party in the relationship is the one with the problems. Even after the divorce is final and even many years after, some still blame the other individual for the divorce. You see this from both parties usually. It's always the other persons fault. Sure one party may have caused most of the problems in the relationship because of their lack of character or bad decisions, but It seems to me that the problem happened way earlier though. Much earlier than the divorce stage. In fact, it started when they married each other. Yes, it's true that you can't control another individual making them act right. Human beings have free will, and sometimes can change for the worst. They can make bad decisions that lead to divorce. I think it really comes down to making a better decision in the beginning though. This is where the focus should be. A well thought out plan and life can save you from so much heartache in the end. When you don't really know yourself, what you need or take time to really discover who the person of your interest is, you set yourself up for failure. In many relationships, it's almost like they were doomed from the start. Like divorce was already scheduled the day they said "I do"



So here are a few keys to consider in regards to having successful relationships

1. Are you truly content, happy and satisfied to be alone or are you desperate? If you are desperate or feel incomplete in some way, you are in danger of settling for the wrong person. The person that doesn't match with what you really need. Sure they may fill some emotional needs, but over time with the wrong person, you will probably end up wanting more from each other. Wanting what you both may not be able to give. I think the whole "you complete me" thing is a bunch of garbage. Although it sounds romantic, it implies that you aren't complete in some way when you are single. Two incomplete individuals don't equal a complete marriage.

2. Do you truly know yourself? This is quite possibly the most important thing. Knowing yourself allows you to make better decisions on who you allow into your life. You can better determine who qualifies for relationship.

3. Do you live with boundaries that line up with your values and principles? Having rules for yourself on what is acceptable in a relationships is so important. Having a well thought out plan for dating including what actions are acceptable is invaluable. Dating is great because it allows you to become better at relationships as well as realize better what is important to you. Dating several people is good but not with too much affection though. I think it only leads to heartbreak in the end.

4. Do you make good decisions based on rational thought rather than emotions? I heard a phrase that stuck with me. It goes "emotions are great to feel with but terrible to live by". So true! Do you jump into relationships too quickly? How bout touch, affection and sex? Do you develop the relationship slowly or go from 0 to 100 miles per hour on the passion highway? Affection too quickly ties you to a person emotionally too quickly. Before you've even really got to know who they are and if they qualify for relationship. When a couple has sex, certain brain chemicals are released giving the couple a feeling of emotional bonding. It's the way God designed us and that's why I think it should be reserved only for the lifelong commitment of marriage. I know this is not the case though in so many relationships and not having sex before marriage doesn't guarantee success either. There are so many other factors involved. It can set you up for heartbreak though if the relationship goes sour. Just because he says all the right words, brings you flowers romances you and makes you feel all loved and appreciated doesn't mean that he qualifies. Just because the earth stops, the birds sing and the clouds open up as you see her in that skirt, doesn't mean she qualifies. Hips, lips and finger tips are not a good determination guys. You can be very much attracted to someone that you aren't truly compatible with. Be led by your principles, and rational mind not your hormones and emotions.

5. Take full responsibility for success in relationships. Would you head out on a 7 day hike in the mountains without a plan? Without research? What about food, how much should you take? Did you check the weather reports? Plan for emergencies? If you wanted to have success you would be responsible. In the same way, taking full responsibility for success in relationships require you to plan and prepare. Success is intentional and it's up to you.

6. Do you prepare your mind by seeking wisdom through books etc? Do you listen to ideas from people who don't necessarily think exactly like you, looking for the nugget of wisdom they may bring? No one goes into marriage expecting divorce so what is the difference between the successful and the unsuccessful? Preparation. It's what you don't know and aren't prepared for that ends up hurting you. I heard another great quote that really applies to this "when preparation meets opportunity, success is born"

7. While you are waiting, while you are single, I'm truly convinced that the best way to set yourself up for future relationship success is to become the best person that you can right now. Develop your character. Develop a successful life while single. A successful happy well balanced person is quite attractive to other successful, happy well balanced persons. In fact they are quite attractive period.


I don't by any means think that this blog is all inclusive in what is necessary for a successful relationship, but I do hope that it provides you with some things to think about. Maybe imparts some wisdom, much of which I've learned through mistakes and study. Some of which I've learned through great pain.

Blessings -Rob


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Sunday, October 17, 2010

Opposition is to be expected


Comedian Bill Cosby was quoted "I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody. " Wow! Very profound when you think about it. Not everyone will always approve of you or what you do. Not everyone will always agree with you and not everyone will always see things your way. Genius Albert Einstein said "Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds"


If you are going to find your true greatness, it's not going to be found in being like everyone else. It will be found in your individuality. Your uniqueness is where the potential lies for greatness, not in your sameness. When something is rare it's worth more right? Well what about the gifts, talents and skills that you possess? No one else on the face of the planet has or will ever have what you've been given. They may have similar gifts to yours, but not exactly the same and in the same combination. You are like a snowflake, unique and beautiful. If you are going to walk out your individuality, get ready for some opposition. In fact, the more individualistic in your thinking, many times the more opposition. Consider what happened on December 1, 1955 in Montgomery, Alabama. Rosa Parks, a black woman, stood up for civil rights by refusing to comply with a bus driver asking her to give up her seat to a white man. By doing this she made a huge impact in regards to the civil rights movement. At this time, segregation was wide spread and her act of defiance was a huge step forward and was a symbol of the progressing idea of civil rights. Why should a black man or woman be treated differently than a white man or women in a country who's constitution declares equal rights for all men and women? Rosa stood up for what she believed in. She had many who, at that time, disagreed with her decision and even her ideology. I'm sure that even many well meaning black men and women probably disagreed with her too and her decision to be defiant to the bus driver and stay seated. Although they may have yearned for equal rights, they might have felt that it was the wrong way to go about change. Nevertheless, it wasn't their decision, it was hers. She made it and because of it, many now honor her historical contribution. She wasn't afraid to be different. She wasn't afraid to make a decision and act based on her convictions. By standing up for what she believed, she made history. In what way will you make history? In what way will you change the world? What will you bring to this wonderful planet and after you are gone, what will be your legacy? Will you make your mark in business? Building and creating jobs and industry? Will you make your mark in social work? Helping protect and heal others? Will you do it in the arts? Through music,film and other media? Will you write that book? Teach that class? How bout in the home? Will you raise up wonderful children? Grooming them for success in life? Grooming them to become all that they were made to be in life and reach their highest potential? What a huge call in life to raise up wonderful children. How will you make your mark? What will people say about your life when you are gone? What will they remember about you?


Quit worrying about what others think and start becoming. You don't have the precious time to waste on trying to please others. As long as your goals are noble, and mean something to you then pursue them with passion. You must get what is hidden inside of you out. You must become. The world is yearning with expectancy for what you will bring. The potential is within, but it's up to you to believe it's there and pull it out.


Blessings- Rob


Please visit me @ roblovegreen.com


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Thursday, October 14, 2010

I think God has a sense if humor


I think God has a sense of humor. Humans are creatures of habit and we like things to stay the same, yet something always comes along unexpected. We get comfortable and like to always know what to expect, yet life is always changing. Always throwing us a wrench in our perfect plans. That's why it's so important to allow for flexibility in our plans. Even the most well thought out plans will sometimes face the unexpected. When you plan, keep this in mind. Plan for the unplanned and unexpected. That way it hopefully won't catch you off guard when it comes. I definately think one is best off when expecting the best, but I also am aware of reality. I do know also though that many times life sends us blessings in disguise. An unexpected seemingly negative event can in many cases, turn out to be a great thing. We might not recognize that potential when it comes though. It might turn out teaching us something that we need to know to be successful in our future. Many times it's our reaction to what comes that affects the outcome. If we can stay flexible, humble and optimistic we will be surprised how many seemingly negative events can turn out for the positive. Optimism allows us to view the unexpected with a non judgemental attitude. It activates our creativity which allows us to find the good in the situation and present solutions to a problem.

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You are not alone in your pain


You are not alone in your pain, whatever it may be. Pain, although it being uncomfortable at the time, can in many instances bring positive change to ones life. The lesson is hard while going through it, it causes us to become humble and reevaluate what is really important in our lives. You see wealthy people in pain. You see people of humble means in pain. If you are human, then you are already signed up for pain. If you aren't experiencing it now, it's coming. You can't avoid it. It's coming and it's going to change you.

Pain truly does change a person. It causes them to seek answers and find solutions. Solutions that they can later on share with others, helping them out of their pain. Some pain can be avoided by our decisions, some cannot. Life is a mystery in this way. I know that when I'm in pain, I hide it from others. I suffer in silence. I'm sure others do as well. It's one thing to be stuck in a pit with a rope to climb, it's a whole other thing to be in that pit in the dark with no rope. My heart goes out to all who suffer. May God send you someone with a rope and a flashlight. May you be the one to bring that rope and flashlight to others.


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Monday, October 11, 2010

Don't wait for others to recognize the greatness in you before you do


Don't wait for others to recognize the greatness in you before you do or you could be waiting forever. There is a McDonalds near to where I live that I have been visiting for many years. There is a nice older woman who works there. She has worked there for many years. I would see her from time to time as I stop in. I stopped in today and saw her working but something was diferent about her. She was dressed professionally, white shirt,etc. Just like the other managers. Now last time I remember seeing her, that was not the case. She obviously had been pretty recently promoted. I asked her how long she had been a manager and she told me a year. She then proceeded to tell me that she had worked there twelve years. I told her "wow! It's about time." her face lit up with the biggest smile. I imagined all of creation rejoicing in her final promotion to management as the Haleluah chorus played. Seriously. She earned it. She was always running around busy when I would see her. This time, I noticed that something else about here seemed different. Not just her new clothes and nametag displaying her management status. But something about the way she carried herself. The gleam in her eye as she held direct eye contact with me. The confidence in her demeanor. I hadn't noticed this the last time I had seen her which was before her promotion. Her new found confidence had to have come from the change in her self concept. It wasn't just that now she had more responsibilities but it was a change in how she saw herself. Now she dresses and acts like a manager, like a leader. Her belief about herself has changed. She must see herself differently now than before when she was just a regular employee for eleven years. It was pretty amazing to see how much she had changed just by someone believing in her enough to promote her. It makes me wonder though, what if she would have saw herself this way she does now many years before? Surely it doesn't take eleven years to finally qualify for promotion at McDonalds right? Maybe if she would have saw herself as a manager earlier someone would have recognized her leadership qualities and promoted her much sooner. Maybe she had to wait eleven years until someone finally felt obligated enough to promote her simply because she had been there longer than anyone else. Kinda like a cushy government job where promotions aren't always given on merit but senority. People act in accordance to their beliefs about themselves. Your beliefs about yourself determine the image that you send out to others. Others treat you in accordance to the image you send out. When you believe you are a leader, you act like a leader. Your actions will always follow your beliefs. As a leader, you take responsibillity for your surroundings. You are always ready to put out extra effort just to improve a situation. Problems don't intimidate you, you see them as challenges you need to overcome. An opportunity to use your problem solving skills. As you provide solutions to the problems around you this gives you an opportunity to shine. Your value as an employee is determined by the problems you solve. As a problem solver, you make your company and boss look good too. When you act like a leader who cares about the well being of the establishment and not there just to get a check, you autimaticly qualify for promotion. It's just a matter of time. If they don't ask you to take a position, you will be asking them. Or you will outgrow your environment an find the promotion somewhere else where someone else will celebrate you and your excellent character. Promotion is awaiting all of us but it all starts in our minds. It has everything to do with your self concept. As you change your beliefs about yourself you will change your position. As they say "what happens in the mind, happens in time". Blessings to you all, I hope this helped you in some way. -Rob

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Respect and honor is magnetic


Respect and honor is magnetic. There is no better way to attract others, make them remember you and make them want to help you in some way. It must be sincere though. From the heart. People can always sense a fake. True, sincere honor and respect is rare these days. When you find it, you are drawn to it. Pulled in like steel to a magnet. Everyone loves to be appreciated. Everyone loves to be loved and adored. You can always find something to admire about an individual. When you focus on the things you admire and then verbalize it to them with sincerity, you've just showered them with honor and respect. It's only considered flattery if it's insincere so it must be from the heart, what you truly believe about the individual. It all starts in your own mind. How you see others. Do you look for their faults or their strengths? Are you judging them? Are you comparing them to some unrealistic standard that you are holding in your head and withholding approval unless they meet it? Are you showing them grace? Honor starts in your mind and is an attitude. Before you even say a word to another, you are actually sending out signals that they can subconsciously receive. Signals that say I like you or I don't. I value you or I don't. This is called non verbal communication and humans communicate so much more in this way than many recognize. This is through body language, eye contact, etc. Over the years I have personally seen how much real honor and respect can open doors for you. I have received special treatment,favors,free stuff and had people help me attain my goals. From connecting well with a customer and persuading them to buy a product from me, to getting free food at a restaurant. From not having to stand in a long line at a Las Vegas night club and being escorted to the front, to getting let into the VIP lounge or private parties for free. I could tell you some amazing stories. Whatever the goal, whatever the environment, whether Church, a business or a bar, you always have to deal with people. People are what makes the world go round. Sometimes honoring a secretary, gets you in to talk to the boss. Showing kindness to a housekeeping worker at a hotel gets you extra towels, etc. People will go out of their way to help someone that makes them feel appreciated. Honor and respect is key. It's not who you know, but who you know that likes you. Sometimes a manager thinks that the way to treat his employees is to rule them with an iron scepter,making them feel inferior. That in some way, their low paying position is not as important. When in all reality, it's usually the low paying positions that have the most to do with the success of the company. Small hinges move huge doors. If a hamburger is overcooked or the fries are cold, this directly reflects on how the customer will feel about the company. Whether or not they will want to return and spend more money. If the manager fails to treat the employee with respect, he actually makes it harder on himself to attain his personal and work related goals. Who wants to work hard for a unappreciative jerk? Now on the other hand, as he shows appreciation, honor and respect for his employees, they want too work hard for him. They want to help him achieve his goals of running a successful business and making customers happy. Honor and respect is key. Try it out today and get a taste of what I'm talking about. Go out today and show extra honor and respect for everyone you come in contact with. Even the grouchy ones if you run into them. Try to find something good about them that you can appreciate. Observe how others attitude towards you is a direct reflection of your attitude towards them. I've made grouchy frowns turn to smiles. Go out and make peoples day brighter and watch how bright your own day becomes. It's like magic, seriously.......


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Saturday, October 9, 2010

Positive self expectancy is like the oil in your engine



It takes the same amount of mental energy to believe something will work as it does to believe that it won't work. Don't talk yourself out of success before you even try. This reminds me of a joke my father told me. A young man was driving down a old country road in the middle of the night when suddenly, he heard the repetitive thump of a flat tire. He pulled to the side of the road, got out of his car to inspect and sure enough, he had a flat. Miles from any public services and without mobile phone service, he realize that he was going to have to fix the flat or be stuck on the side of the road till morning. The only problem was that when he began to search for his jack, he realized that he had taken it out weeks earlier and forgot to put it back in the car. He had the spare tire but just needed the jack. He scanned the horizon and under the starlight he could barely make out a farm house in the distance. He decided to give it a shot, maybe the farmer had a jack he could borrow. Now has he began to walk down the road in that direction, some thoughts came to him as he noticed that all the lights were out. He thought, "It's the middle of the night." "I'm going to wake the farmer up, he's probably going to be angry." "He probably won't loan me a jack anyways." "He'll probably yell at me, maybe even tell me to get off his property while scolding me for disrupting his sleep." "Can't you see the lights are out boy!!" As the young man got closer and closer to the farm house, he got more and more apprehensive about knocking on the farmers door. His mind raced with the same repetitive negative thoughts. So much that he became pretty much convinced that the whole thing was a bad idea and was going to be a negative experience. Finally as he reached the house, he reluctantly knocked on the door awaiting impending doom. The light flipped on in the back of the house. He could hear some noise in the house. The mans heart raced. After about thirty seconds, that seemed like an eternity, finally the front door opened and the farmer said "yes". The young man blurted out "Fine!! Nevermind!!! I don't want your Jack anyway!!!" and walked away briskly, upset at the farmer. The farmer just stood there puzzled. I thought this story was hilarious and a great way to illustrate a point. In the story, before he even got to the house, the young man had convinced himself of failure. He thought of all the reasons that it wouldn't work out rather than all the reasons it would. In his own mind, he had convinced himself that the farmer was going to say no,be angry and reject him, so much that he reacted before giving the poor farmer a chance to answer him. So many times, we can do the same thing in life. Maybe not as extreme as the this story illustrates. We should be careful that we don't let limiting beliefs hold us back from our dreams. Maybe that beautiful girl will go out with you if you only ask. In fact, maybe she's thinking you are pretty hot stuff yourself, yet doesn't have the confidence to ask you out. Maybe that promotion at work is awaiting you but if you don't get it, it's not because you aren't qualified, maybe the other guy asked the manager for it and you didn't. Don't short change yourself in your own imagination. Learn to cultivate positive expectations and eliminate negative limiting ones. Don't think that you won't be successful when like I said before, it takes the same amount of mental energy to believe that you will. It's amazing how much an attitude of "positive self expectancy" can revolutionize your life. How it can speed up you achieving your goals. Positive self expectancy is like the oil in your engine. Blessings -Rob


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Friday, October 8, 2010

Is the "Golden rule" obsolete? Really?


We've all heard of the "Golden Rule", which is "do unto others, as you would want them to do unto you." Well there is a better more effective one "The Platinum Rule" it's "Do unto others , as they wish you would do unto them." It's so much better because many times loving others requires us to adapt to them. To change our approach. Everyone has different needs and we as humans have a tendancy to think that others needs are exactly the same as ours. We think that what makes us feel loved and appreciated is the same for others when in fact that is not so. People get their emotional needs met in different ways. There is a book that has been out for quite some time called "The five love languages" by Gary Chapman. In the book it discusses the five love languages that people speak. The five love languages are 1.Physical touch or affection 2. Words of affirmation 3. Acts of service 4. Gifts 5. Quality time spent It's interesting that so many times we are busy doing the wrong things with the right intentions. We are busy loving others the best way we know how but it's simply not effective. We tend to give them what we need rather than what they need. So in any relationship this becomes a problem because one person is loving the other person the best way they know how but the other person can still feel neglected. It's important to identify the love languages of the people close to you so that you can effectively give them love the way they are capable of receiving it. Now using all the different ways to love someone is awesome, but their will be one or two main ways most effective in making them feel loved and appreciated. This works in all types of relationships from marriage to business relationships. For example if a coworkers love language is "gifts" and you want them to feel appreciated, you can show up at work with a small gift for them. It doesn't have to cost a lot, in fact it's really not the amount as much as it is the fact that you got them something. I'm reminded of a story I heard about a husband who would wear himself out doing chores around the house. Dishes, laundry, etc. Always making sure everything was done and the house was super clean and in order. He felt so good inside and that he was loving his wife by doing this. All the while his wife felt neglected. His love language was "acts of service" and hers was "quality time spent". He thought his "acts of service" was the most effective way of loving his wife because that's what makes him feel loved. His wife was thinking, "why is he staying so busy with all these things?" " Why is he neglecting me?" "Can't he just spend some time with me?" Eventually she told him "I feel so alone" Which was her way of saying "I feel unloved by you" This of course made him upset hearing this. He was thinking "I have been doing all this work to love you." "Laundry is always done, dishes, etc. , how can you say that?" So they may have been using the "Golden Rule" but they weren't using the "Platinum rule". The simply weren't speaking the same language, which led to conflict and hurt. It's not enough to have good intentions in relationships. What matters is "are you effective?" Do your kids feel loved? Does your spouse feel loved? How about your coworker? Do they feel appreciated? If you are a boss, how bout your employees? When people feel loved and appreciated, they will go out of their way to help you achieve your goals. Everything in life revolves around relationships. No one can achieve anything of great value alone. We all need each other. It's the way God designed it. So choose to be most effective in your relationships. Make it your goal to recognize peoples main love languages the treat them accordingly. As you do this, you will be so surprised how your own needs will get met in the process. We really do reap what we sow. Blessings -Rob


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Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Live each day with purpose



Live each day with purpose, live each hour with purpose. Develop the habit of deciding how your day will be, then staying on course through constant self reminders. Remind yourself daily of your strengths. This is who you are and where the secret to your purpose lies. You Are not made for everything but you are made for something. Once you discover who you are, stay in the center of this purpose. It's there that you will be most effective and fulfilled. I'm reminded of a great analogy to teach the importance and power of staying focused. A 100 watt light bulb can light up a room with it's 100 watts of light energy. That same 100 watts of light energy, when highly focused and directed becomes a laser and has the ability to burn through steel. What's the difference in the light bulb and the laser? It's focus. As it is with a laser, so it is with you. Don't underestimate what you can achieve when you stay focused on a goal. It's true, in this day and age, we all must juggle many things, but your ability to stay focused on a few things, doing them well, rather than many, will make you most effective. Each day is full of opportunities presented to us as well as distractions. Our ability to recognize the difference is of utmost importance to our success. Every minute of your day has a purpose. It's your responsibility to asign it the correct one. Stay on course, others depend on you being the best you possible. Never before in history, nor in the future will there ever be another you. No one brings to this world what you do. Too many people in life spend so much of their time trying to be like others rather than celebrating their own uniqueness. Remember, you can choose to be a mediocre copy, or an amazing original. The world doesn't need another copy but it's yearning for another original.

Blessings -Rob

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Some days may seem more challenging than others.


Some days may seem more challenging than others. This is normal. Some days you may feel like you are moving forward at 100 miles an hour, others 25. Your daily speed can fluctuate. That's ok. Its not really as important how fast you move towards your goals daily as it is the fact that you are moving forward towards them. Making progress, even if it's only a little bit, it's still progress. Give yourself credit, even for the little things. Sometimes we can be too hard on ourselves. Make sure you be your own best friend. Love yourself. Believe in yourself. Make sure you are kind and respectful when talking to yourself. Remember, you are not in a race against others. You are running your own race and as long as you stay focused on your own individual goals, you are winning. If you have an exceptionally hard day or week, avoid the pitfall of assuming that the next day or week will also be difficult. In fact the odds are in your favor of having a great day or week because you always have a choice. You can change your mind, your wisdom and approach. You can guarantee success through your thoughts and actions.

Blessings- Rob

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